*logs out of twitter for 52 years*
PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM OR SO HELP ME
- Intimacy. Hold my waist. Stroke my neck. Kiss my forehead. Hold my hand.
- Maturity. Patience is amazing. A prize will come to you when the time is right. Its called falling in love. Waiting is hard. But worth it.
- Honesty. I don’t care what you’ve done. I care about what you will do in the future. Be honest with me, I’ll be honest with you.
- Care. Because not many people give a crap about anything anymore.
[Image Description: Background is several triangles in a circle like a pie alternating from true red, scarlet and black. A robin is sitting on his perch looking to the right.
Top Text: “CUSTOMER ABUSES RETURN POLICY.”
Bottom Text: “TRIES TO GET AWAY WITH AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE”]
At our store we call this woman “Rent-a-Center lady”, because that’s what she thinks we are. She first came to my attention (though this was not the first time she’d been a problem) soon after I started at the returns desk. She had bought an expensive TV nearly three months before (in fact, exactly 88 days before, but I’ll get to that), and she wanted to exchange it for a new one. Apparently she was in the habit of buying things, waiting until the 90-day return policy had nearly expired (hence the 88 days), and then exchanging the item for a new one. Rinse and repeat every 88 days in turn with each newly exchanged item, thus always remaining under the return period for each item. We quickly caught on and our security associate told her we wouldn’t do it anymore. She was furious, gave the security associate an earful, called Corporate (which did nothing), and stormed out.
The thing with Rent-a-Center lady, though, is that she waits three or four months between attempts, so there’s a very good chance that when she comes in again she’ll get someone at the desk to help her that has never seen her before. This is why she tends to get away with her crap more often than not. And it’s not just her 88-day-return habit that she has. She also claims to have lost money in the soda machines (several dollars each time), demanding that we reimburse her. She takes other people’s receipts from their outdoor trash, finds the item on our shelf, and then returns it as if she bought it. The terrible thing is, though, that we know she does these things, but no one’s ever caught her in the act, so our managers are always loath to stop her. Corporate has a “the customer must win” policy that pretty much hamstrings us when it comes to putting our foot down. Fortunately, she finally crossed a line.
One day I came in to hear that she’d already been to the desk three times that day, having done multiple transactions with a different associate each time. Each associate was one that didn’t know her, so she got away with everything. When she came in a fourth time, she fortunately came to me and I told her we weren’t going to help her anymore that day. She left, and the front-end manager immediately went to the store manager. He (the front-end manager) was so angry that it actually managed to convince the store manager that something needed to be done, and so we were told to refuse her no matter what she wanted, whether she had a receipt or not, even if it was something like “I lost 50 cents in the soda machine”.
I can’t even describe how happy I was when she came back again several months later and I was the one she came to. I had been hoping and praying that I was the one who got to tell her no, not least because she infuriated me, but because I knew there was a good chance the person she did go to wouldn’t know to tell her no, since they might not have seen her before. So thank God, she came to me, handed me an item, and said, “I’d like to return this.” I told her I couldn’t, not even if she was able to find the receipt (she didn’t have one). Her expression, which was normally smug and self-satisfied, hardened. She said, “Is that a new rule?” I said, “It’s pretty recent, yeah.” “Does it apply to everyone?” I barely contained a smile. “No, just you.” Her fury was something to behold. I explained what the store manager had said, she screamed at me, called corporate right in front of me, and demanded a manager. But of course, as soon as I told her the manager was on his way, she bolted out the door.
This was at least two years ago, and I haven’t seen her since.
This is like porn
I knew this was going to be epic when I started reading it.
how can i take selfies without wanting to kill myself afterwards
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